Archive for May, 2010

Cleaning House

Posted in Uncategorized on May 29, 2010 by DJ D

Hey! Look who’s still alive. Well, undead anyway. No, I haven’t completely forgotten about this place. Just been busy/lazy/drunk/fill in lame excuse here. I actually started to write a post a little over a month ago while dead drunk, but ended up scrapping it. I had just finished doing one of the best editions of Dark Entries that I’ve done in a long time, went to a hippy dive bar down the street from my house, and 5 rum and cokes and a drunk dial to KB later, and I got it in my brain that rattling off a tipsy post for the blog would be a good idea. Well, after sitting down a second ago and reading over it (thank God I never hit “Publish” on the thing), I thought better of it, so unfortunately it will be sent to blogging purgatory. Maybe it will meet up with all the other dead posts out there in a church somewhere and hang out with Charlie from Party of Five, a hobbit, and that black guy in the wheel chair from that prison show. Oh, wait, he didn’t make it. He’s still running around on the island with that dog.

Now I have to wonder how many people have read this far and haven’t kept up with the reference. Oh, and I know everybody’s mourning the end of the show and all, but I’m more bummed about about 24 coming to an end. That was my second favorite show on television. My first favorite? Smallville. Yeah, I said it. You wanna make something of it? Yeah, this season kind of sucks and yeah just about everybody and his brother knows that Clark’s got powers at this point, and I don’t know how they’re going to explain where his costume’s going to come from or the fact that he’s already met and fallen in love with Lois when everybody knows they’re not supposed to meet until after he becomes Superman, and what’s up with…

Sorry. Nerded out there for a second.

K, back to the task at hand. I was noticing something the other day.

1) I haven’t written anything here in a while, and while I’ve got a couple of big posts in the works for the near future, that’s hardly an excuse for not writing something in the meantime.

2) I’ve been filling up my phone with pics of just about every stupid or interesting thing I come across. Of course, they’re almost all taken with the intention of writing about them at some point, but while I’m good at Phase 1 of the plan (the picture taking), I’m not doing so well on the Phase 2 part (the writing).

So, to that end, here we go…

I went to my little cousin’s graduation the other day. It was just the cutest little thing you ever did see. My wittle cousin Bethany’s all grown up. I got into town late because my car’s been in the shop and I had to go pick it up before I could hit the road and make the hour and a half drive back to my home town. I parked across the street in the parking lot of my old elementary school. The way it’s laid out is you have the high school, then the elementary school across the street, then behind that is my old middle school. And next to that is the apartments where I spent my childhood.

So, I sprinted across the yard of my elementary school, across the street, and ran down to the bleachers where the graduation ceremony was taking place. My whole family was already seated there and I knew I had no hope of finding them in the crowd, but I was just trying to get there in time to see my cousin get her diploma. I could hear the names announced on the loudspeaker, and the first one I heard was someone named Phillips. So, I started to run. My cousin’s last name isn’t Phillips, but it comes right after that. A couple of Phillips’ were called and the second I went through the gate and I looked down on the field I heard her name. And there she was, making her walk. I had juuuust made it. The picture below was taken after all the kids had made their walks and sat back down. At this point they were in the middle of singing the alma mater. Seconds after I took this, they raised their fists in the air, tossed their caps, and sprayed silly string all over the place. Then, everyone rushed the field.

After I made my way down onto the field and joined my cousin and the rest of the family, I realized how weird of an experience it was. The last time I stood on that field, I was the one wearing the cap and gown and graduating high school. Bethany was four at the time, and her little brother and sister hadn’t even been born yet. Her dad graduated from the same high school, and when his younger brother did the same thing, Bethany’s mother was pregnant with her, so she’s actually been to 3 graduations on that same football field. I remember her being this little baby that WOULD NOT STOP CRYING when my mom used to babysit her. That was what, last week? No? 18 years ago??? Who let that happen?

Something else happened the other day. I came home from work and found that an intruder had ransacked my bedroom. He had made a wreck of the place, drug out everything I had under my bed, and before he had a chance to completely get away with it, I managed to snap a picture of him in the middle of the act. Note the look of total guilt.

And lastly, I hate my day job. I’m thankful to be gainfully employed, but I work for a company and a department run by idiots, staffed by idiots, and I spend my day on the phone talking to more idiots. The money for the most part is good, but hardly worth it, and I’ll be glad when I move on to something that doesn’t stress me out this much and fill my days with “have you gotten that memo about the TPS reports” moments.

Case in point. I know this may not fully relay the kind of thing I have to put up with on a daily basis, but this one sign in the restroom illustrates the brain trust that makes the decisions in my department. Maybe you’ll get an idea of what I’m dealing with.

Putting aside the fact that I work with the types of people who would actually put food in the restroom sink, please note the TOTAL LACK OF PUNCTUATION. I mean, would be it be that hard throw a period in there somewhere? A comma? Something? If you think this is bad, you should see the spreadsheets and 45,000 memos that come across my desk and e-mail inbox every day. They make about as much sense.

More phone-pic house cleaning coming up on the next post, but not so much random. It’ll all make sense. Promise.