Me, my cat bite, and my Johnson.

I’ve been cat-sitting for a while. I’ve shown a pic of him once or twice here. A friend of mine asked me to take in him last fall when he fell at work and broke his back and had to move back in with his parents. They have 3 big dogs in the house and the cat wouldn’t get along there too well. It was supposed to be a temporary thing just until he got back on his feet and got another place. Then he’d take the cat back. Well, that was almost a year ago and he’s supposidly not showing any sign of healing up or getting out of his parents’ house any time soon. The cat’s pretty sweet but has this constant compulsion to bite anything and everything. I was petting him last night after I came in from work and he got me pretty good. He’s bitten me before, sometimes lightly just as he was playing around, and sometimes out of anger, and it always stung, but it wasn’t anything that didn’t heal up after a couple of days. I’ve had a cat of my own for 17 years so I’m no stranger to getting a cat bite here and there. But this one kind of has me a little worried. I noticed late last night that it was starting to swell around the bite marks. The swelling hasn’t gone down and it’s all red and the area around it still hurts. I Googled “cat bites”, and everything I read makes it sound like it could be infected. I consider myself to be a pretty tough little guy, but despite my Cherokee/Scottish background, deep down inside me is a neurotic little Jewish man that’s already convinced this will lead to my entire arm swelling up and rotting off. I gave some serious thought to going to the doctor today but seeing that I’m a little skint for cash, can’t find my insurance card, and can’t find anything that’s open on a Sunday I decided to wait till tomorrow when I could maybe ask for a day off sometime this week.

Here’s the offending wound. He got me with one bottom tooth and one top tooth. You can see the two marks there. Anyone know anything about infections? What am I up against here?


So, on a totally unrelated topic, to de-stress myself from money tightness, job stress, and possibly infected animal bites, here’s a little something that makes me crack up into a juvenile laughing fit every time I see it. And yes, this was a real commercial. The 80’s were such a more innocent time, weren’t they?


8 Responses to “Me, my cat bite, and my Johnson.”

  1. Wow, a way of life for only fifty years, huh? Hope you don’t get your hand amputated from that MASSIVE bite 😉

    I don’t think the picture really does it justice. The entire top of my hand was pretty swollen, especially when you compare it to the other one. I think the fact that it swelled up and there’s been constant pain all over my hand and fingers since the bite is what freaked me out. I was afraid some kind of infection was spreading, especially after everything I read on the internet. The swelling and pain isn’t gone completely, but it’s starting to go a little.

  2. Ok, tomorrow…go buy some generic neosporin/triple antibiotic ointment. Get the one with “pain reliever.” Put it on your hand every once in awhile and it should be less red in a day or two. Whatever you do, don’t put alcohol or peroxide on it. Puncture wounds no-likey.

    I’m stealing that Johnson and postin’ like it’s hot.

    And yes, re: your text. Good story. Wonder if there’s a vlog about it? Try to remain calm.

    Thanks for the suggestion. I’m getting some tomorrow. Hopefully it will help.

    As for the vlog…let’s hope not.

  3. That commercial is awesome!! I’d ask where you found it but I’m a little afraid to know!

    And as for the cat? That’s why I’m a dog person! Everyone knows cats are evil!!!

    I actually saw it on Attack of the Show the other day, so I guess I stole it from them. That’s ok. Amy stole it from me and I’m sure somone will steal it from her and soon it will spread like a cancer. A cancer of the Johnson.

    Yes, they are evil and even though I’m getting a little attached to him, when I have to seriously consider going to the doctor because of someone else’s cat…it’s time to come get your fucking cat.

  4. Looks like he got you pretty good! I hope it’s not infected!
    As for that commercial. Man, I miss the old days. Although I’m pretty sure we wouldn’t laugh about it back then. I don’t think those “Big Johnson” shirts hit the market ’til ’92 or so.

    I think the further you go back, the more innocent we were, and more unintentionally dirty at the same time without realizing it. After all, we are the same country that once aired a sitcom where the main character was named Beaver.

  5. As long as the cat doesn’t steal your breath at night, it’s okay.

    I’m not ruling it out.

  6. “…you, your girl and your Johnson…”

    Unreal and so amazing.
    Great wound, man!

    I’m not sure if you’re being sarcastic or not, but I’ll take it either way

  7. So what ever happened with the cat bite? Do you still have your arm or did it rot off?

    Arm is intact. After a few days the whole top of my hand swelled up pretty big, and the pain made its way into my fingers. My hand was really sensitive an painful to the touch and I started getting pretty concerned. But, I gave it one more day to see what happened and it started to go away. I now have 2 little puffed up scars where the teeth marks are. Thanks a lot, cat.

  8. Geez, am I late for the party again! Things have just been hectic lately and my job sucks the life out of me. I’ll be eventually looking for a new one, but gotta stick this one out for a while for the insurance!

    So, did you get the Rabies or what?

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