It’s after 1:00 am on a Monday night and I really need to be in bed. Instead, I’ve stayed up tonight catching up on some of my favorite blogs and coming to the realization that we are 16 days away from Halloween. That’s 2 weeks and 2 days. TWO WEEKS AND 2 DAYS.
Two weeks and 2 days away from my favorite day of the year. Yes, I’m holding it up above even my birthday, which is just a scant 2 days after Halloween.
I also came to the realization that my favorite season of the year is here and I haven’t written a word about it. Come to think of it, I haven’t written a word about anything in a long time. So, for the handful of you who bother to even check in with this thing (and I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t), let’s talk a little bit about something creepy. And old. And in my bedroom.
THIS GUY. He’s a shrunken head. Actually, he’s a coconut carved to look like a shrunken head. Actually, he’s a coconut carved to look like the shrunken head of a monkey, apparently. I snagged him in a storage shed behind my grandfather’s house when he died back in 1990. He’s hung above my bed ever since. I’d like to share some further insight into that, but the truth is, I don’t have any. He’s a creepy coconunt carved to look like a shrunken monkey head. It speaks for itself. I don’t have the faintest clue as to where my grandfather got him or how. All I know is that he hangs above my bed every night and that’s creepy enough.
NOW THIS GUY. THIS GUY… I created this guy my senior year of high school in art class. He’s made out of paper mache and hangs on the opposite wall, near the foot of my bed, so that he and Shrunken Head Monkey Coconut up there are cursed into an eternity of staring each other in the eye. I don’t remember much about the point of the assignment aside from my teacher telling me to not make it too gory. Everyone thought at first it was going to be a monkey when they saw the skeletal structure that formed the snout. That’s just stupid. Who hangs a fake monkey’s head in their bedroom? That’s just –
The other major memory I have of creating him is that some dillweed (I can’t remember the last time I actually said, “dillweed”) knocked him over and dinged him up a little. You can see in the picture up there the dent on the left side of his snout and a crack going down the ear on the right. That would be the work of a dillweed. Here’s a side view:
Also, you can’t make it out, but the blanket that I sat these on in order to take the pictures is one made up of images of wolves. So, I kind of stuck to a theme there.
I ended up going a little gory. Sorry, Ms. Smith.
And because it’s late and I’m tired, I’m closing this out with one of my favorite werewolf transformations from my favorite werewolf movie ever, The Howling. I’ll try not to make this the last thing I write before Halloween. Shrunken Head Monkey Coconut, here I come…
UPDATE: I was going to end things there, but felt I had to mention that for those of you who aren’t in the know (and you need to get yourselves in the know) when it comes to The Howling, the pretty, blonde victim there is Dee Wallace, one of the greatest actresses of our time, and one of the nicest people I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. I met her last year at the amazing Mad Monster Party horror convention in Charlotte. Here’s my autograph. She had a lot of pictures to choose from, but of course I had to go with the one from The Howling.
And here I am, happy as can be and looking like a total goober.